We like to eat with Harry cause Harry is our mate. We like to eat with Harry cause he can eat in 8,7,6,5,4,3,2,1!

Wednesday 2nd October

Up early and keen to get a day full of fun activities underway, Jamie, Bea, and Martin took a tuk tuk with good old Mr. Jolly to LaLit (a rather posh hotel that was too important to answer the phone) to get a price for golf and massages for boys-and-girls day. They looked around the beautiful course and spa, but Jamie said it was 'prohibitively expensive,' and they returned with the suggestion we pack up and move north.

We arranged cabs, grabbed beers (or attempted to after the boys had near enough cleared out the tiny offie of all its supplies), and hit the road...one girls' car, one boys'. The drive north took about an hour and a half, and at a toilet stop, we all replenished our boozy stock. Us girls managed to get our hands on Bacardi Breezers. Personally, I’m not a fan of these super-sweet alcopops, but Adams found a passion fruit-flavoured one made with spring water that tasted surprisingly close to a Rio, so I gulped it down rather happily.

The boys had also re-stocked. Back in the cars, Harry was a dead giveaway for the boys' intoxication levels as he leaned out of the car window smiling, tongue between teeth, pointing in the direction we should take (in case our driver found it too challenging to follow the direction of the car immediately in front of us).

At Anjuna, we grabbed our mountain of bags and headed straight for Shore Bar—a well-decked bar that looked out over the beach. The boys ordered a round of vodka sprites for the girls, deciding we most certainly needed to catch up.

Jamie, Patty, Harry, Katy, and Ginge went on a scouting mission for accommodation whilst the rest of us continued to make friends with the local vodka. They returned with nowhere to stay but had met an American guy mid-mission who said he’d take someone round on his bike to look. Jamie announced that Harry had gone, but Harry was with them. After playing Rock Paper Scissors, there was alcohol-induced confusion about who had gone and who had stayed (the winner or the loser).

As it turns out, Patty had lost and gone. Patty also returned empty-handed in terms of a location to rest our heads...but with the American, who we bought a beer to say thanks for his efforts.

Eventually, Jamie and Patty saved us all from being homeless for the night and booked us into the place we later found out was called UV Disco. The air-conditioned chalets were on the beach and looked clean and tidy, and everyone was happy (for now at least).

We all changed up and headed onto the beach, where the boys were challenged by some local kids to a game of cricket. The stakes were set...losers bought Pepsis for the winners. The kids were incredible and smashed the boys out of the water with an incredible 47-6.

Without Martin’s 6 runs, the boys would have all been completely humiliated as each one of them was out at the first bowl. After this defeat, they tried to redeem themselves with a game of football, but alas, the Indian boys won again.

The boys now owed the agreed Pepsis, and Harry was seen escorting three Indian children into his room. His defense for this was that he was simply 'giving the kids some money'...a turn of phrase the lads wouldn’t let him forget quickly.

During all this testosterone-fueled sporting activity, the girls (who were near equal in intoxication levels now) had taken to making a human pyramid on the shoreline.

All still a little drunk and keen to keep the party flowing, we quickly changed up and headed to Guru Bar. The staff were really friendly, and we’d haggled a good price for vodka by the bottle, which continued to flow throughout dinner.

Martin suddenly burst into song with an absolute lad chant:

"We like to drink with Jamie, 'cause Jamie is our mate...
We like to drink with Jamie, 'cause he can drink in 8,7,6,5,4,3,2,1."

Smash. The drink went back. Others had their names called out in the appropriate part of the rhyme and downed their dregs.

Bea & Martin had secretly told the staff that it was Ginge’s birthday, and all of a sudden, to his shock and surprise, a cake with a candle was in front of him and we were all singing Happy Birthday. As Harry’s birthday had also just passed, the cake moved to him. No sooner was it in front of him, the chanting began again, but drink was swapped for eat.

In excellent style, Harry shoveled huge spoonfuls of the thick dairy cake into his mouth...successfully polishing it off and letting it drip down his chin before the countdown reached 1. Sadly, this moment was not caught on camera. To make up for it, we have searched the archives and located an alternative photo of Harry cramming dairy produce into his body at lightning speed.

We made our way back to UV Bar to be greeted by the repetitive beats of the 'trance party' that was taking place. We decided to stroll along the beach, hoping the party would end by our return but had no such success.

Having tactically picked the room furthest from the party, Jamie and I weren’t disturbed by the noise. The damp bed sheets and moldy mattress, however, kept me awake and uncomfortable for most of the night.

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